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ANGEL of MEAT INTERVIEW
the angel of meat speaks her mind.
(angel of meat = AOM)
DAVE THOMPSON HOMEPAGE
DAVE THOMPSON is a gifted comic, writer and performer.
His voluminous resume includes writing credits for such shows as ITV1's THE SKETCH SHOW, and HARRY HILL's SHARK INFESTED CUSTARD, in which he also appeared as a stooge.
In 2007, I WANT CANDY, a motion picture featuring dave t. (as an adult film star), will be released in the united states and europe, to widespread critical acclaim - and there undoubtedly will be awards and talk shows, at which point mr thompson will likely stop returning my emails and phone calls.
I WANT CANDY stars CARMEN ELECTRA - who already doesn't return my emails or calls -- and McKENZIE CROOK, from PIRATES OF THE CARIBBEAN and THE OFFICE. (Who I never call.)
For further information on dave thompson's adventures, you can investigate THE DAVE THOMPSON MySpace PAGE, or
THE DAVE THOMPSON HOMEPAGE.
This story might end right here -- except...
Dave Thompson was also the most notorious, controversial, and purple character in all of childrens' entertainment -- playing the perennially cuddly, handbag-toting TELETUBBY WINKY DINKY ("WINK" to his closer friends like me, and "INKY INKY" to his fan base under 4 and a half.)
Telebubbies -- an advanced race, or primitive backwater hominid untouched by the ravages of civilization? ...And, those TV's in their bellies -- were they born that way, or were the devices surgically implanted?
AND... why do they always dance?
What's it all about?
Which leads me to my first question for DAVE THOMPSON --
ME: WHAT'S IT ALL ABOUT, DAVE?
DAVE THOMPSON: ...Sorry?
ME: --The RUMORS. Were they TRUE?
DAVE THOMPSON: Rumors?
ME: You know, kids' show, adults in costume all day. There must have been rumors.
DAVE THOMPSON:
ME: Antics? Debauchery? Petty theft?
DAVE THOMPSON: Well...
ME: Go On. Go on.
DAVE THOMPSON: I can reveal here exclusively, now, for the first time -- that a considerable amount of debauchery DID in fact go on -- including incest.
ME: KNEW IT!
DAVE THOMPSON:
Many of the rabbits mated betwen takes - they were always too professional to mate on camera. Some of the rabbits were related, and many of them were under eighteen years old. Naturally, when their behaviour was discovered, the producers let them go.
ME: And, where did they let them go TO?
DAVE THOMPSON:
Fox.
ME: I see. I see...
ADVISORY: CHILDREN UNDER TWELVE SHOULD NOT READ ABOVE, ABOUT 'FOX'
ME: It must've been HELLISH. Trying to move around in those big costumes. What were shoots like? Hellish, I bet.
DAVE THOMPSON: It was a bit like a silent movie set in that many of the shots were vocally directed by the first assistant director, as it didn't matter that he could be heard, due to the real sound track being dubbed on later.
ME: Could you see at all? Bet you had some humdinger accidents, crashing into other tubbies-
DAVE THOMPSON: We could only see through the mouths, and if they were shut, we could hardly see at all. So choreographed movement had to be directed either vocally through a megaphone, or laterlly via ear pieces in our ears. A common direction was when we ran up the hill to see the windmill. It went "Walk, two three. Stop, two three. Windmill, two three. Camera, two three." At which point we'd put our paws to our mouths and say "Uh-oh."
ME: I've worked with directors like that.
DAVE THOMPSON:
ME: Dave, you there?
DAVE THOMPSON: I was waiting for a question.
ME: Sorry... Years ago, there were people running around in the U.S. here, saying TINK was destroying family values. Funny how they never accuse mass murderers of that.
...So, you and I have something in common.
...Dave?
DAVE THOMPSON: I was waiting--
ME: My question is: did you hear about this controversy in the U.K., as well?
DAVE THOMPSON: Oh, Yes, Jerry Falwell's comments were widely reported here (in the United Kingdom) too.
ME: So, what's with the PURSE? You were a BOY teletubby, correct?
DAVE THOMPSON:
The Teletubbies are pre-sexual beings, although they do have a gender. Jerry Falwell was projecting adult sexuality onto pre-sexual cuddly toys - he'd missed the point.
ME: I see.
DAVE THOMPSON:
Young children like to have a transitional object, in which they can transfer their maternal attachment to a safe object which they can easily control. In other words, a teddy bear, or similar.
ME: But, they gave you a PURSE--
DAVE THOMPSON: The Teletubbies were planned to have many of the characteristics of very young children, so they all had a 'favourite thing'. Lalaa had the ball (which was in fact a balloon), Dipsy had the hat, Po had the scooter, and Tinky Winky had the bag (you say purse, we say handbag).
ME: Po's going to kill himself on that scooter, drives like a madman.
DAVE THOMPSON:
The bag wasn't supposed to make Tinky Winky effeminate, I think they wanted to go against gender sterotyping by giving a male a hand bag, and a female a scooter.
As far as I know it was an accident that Tinky Winky had a triangular arial (gay symbol, apparently), purple colour (another gay symbol), and the hand bag (feminine attribute).
ME: For the record, I didn't know ANY of those things, until just now, when you told me.
DAVE THOMPSON: When it was first shown, it became very popular with ravers who would watch the early morning broadcast whilst coming down from hallucinogenic drugs. This was also supposed to be an accident, but the woman who masterminded the Teletubbies became one of the richest women in Britain, and is very clever. Maybe she knew they would become a gay and drug culture phenomenon, although the official line is that they are intended for very young children, and nothing more.
ME: This brings me to my most important question -- Where was it shot? I'd like to vacation there.
DAVE THOMPSON:
The company who made the Teletubbies also made Tots TV, which was filmed in a field on a farm just outside Stratford-On-Avon (where Shakespeare was born). The Teletubbies was made in the field next door. With the exception of a few generic blue screen shots (jumping down the hole in the top of the hill at the end of each programme, which was filmed at the BBC studios in London), the show was filmed on location in the field. External shots on and around the hill, internals inside it.
ME: That grass -- real or STUDIO grass?
DAVE THOMPSON:
Only the hill was covered in astro-turf. The rest of it is real grass.
ME: Son-of-gun, it all looked real to me.
ME AGAIN: Back to the costume. What did you wear under there?
DAVE THOMPSON:
The others wore lycra undergarments - I think it was stuff designed for pilots to wear beneath their flight suits. I'm a cotton man myself, so I wore long-sleeved white cotton T shirts, and white martial arts (judo/karate/aikido) trousers beneath the Tinky Winky suit.
ME: I'm a cotton man, myself. Never understood lycra people.
DAVE THOMPSON:
ME: Between takes, what was it like? I heard there was alot of incest, that never made it on camera.
DAVE THOMPSON:
It was often glorious sunny weather, and we relaxed reading books or chatting to members of the crew who weren't directly involved in filming. There was a euphoric atmosphere on the set during the first few months. There are always prolonged periods of waiting around during filming, whilst camera angles and lights are changed, that sort of thing. I was reading a novel a day, at one point. It was such a fantastic job - being paid to live in the countryside, behave like a 3 year old, and lie around reading novels. Nice work if you can get it!
ME: Behaving like a 3 year old -- you should be ashamed.
DAVE THOMPSON:
As we were in the countryside, most of us were staying in a country house hotel in a tiny village. We had great fun eating meals in the hotel restaurant or in local pubs, and socialising.
ME:
Lots of DEBAUCHERY, so I hear.
DAVE THOMPSON:
We left that sort of thing to the rabbits.
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